BOY : May I hold your hand?
GIRL : No thanks, it isn't heavy. ![]()
GIRL : Say you love me! Say you love me! ![]()
BOY : You love me... ![]()
GIRL : If we become engaged will you give me a ring?? ![]()
BOY : Sure, what's your phone number??
GIRL : I think the poorest people are the happiest.
BOY : Then marry me and we'll be the happiest couple ![]()
GIR! L : Darling, I want to dance like this forever.
BOY : Don't you ever want to improve?? ![]()
BOY : I love you and I could die for you!
GIRL : How soon?? ![]()
BOY : I would go to the end of the world for you!
GIRL : Yes, but would you stay there?? ![]()
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MAN : You remind me of the sea.
WOMAN : Because I'm wild, romantic and exciting?
MAN : NO, because you make me sick. ![]()
WIFE : You tell a man something, it goes in one ear and comes out of the other.
HUSBAND : You tell a woman something: It goes in both ears and comes out of the mouth. ![]()
MARY : John says I'm pretty. Andy says I'm ugly.What do u think,
Peter?
PETER : A bit of both. I think you're pretty ugly. ![]()
1) Girlfriend : "...And are you sure you love me and no one else ?"
Boyfriend : "Dead Sure! I checked the whole list again yesterday". ![]()
2) Teacher : "Which is more important to us, the sun or the moon?"
Pupil : "The moon".
Teacher : "Why?"
Pupil : "The moon gives us light ! at night when we need it but the sun gives us light only in the day time when we don't need it". ![]()
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3) Teacher : "What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?"
Pupil : "A teacher". ![]()
4) Waiter : "Would you like your coffee black?"
Customer : "What other colors do you have?" ![]()
5) My father is so old that when he was in school, history was called current affairs. ![]()
6) Teacher : "Sam, you talk a lot !"
Sam : "It's a family tradition".
Teacher : "What do you mean?" Sam : "Sir, my grandpa was a street hawker, my father is a teacher".
Teacher : "What about your mother?"
Sam : "She's a woman". ![]()
7) Tom : "How should I convey the news to my father that I've failed?"
David: "You just send a telegram: Result declared, past year's performance repeated". ![]()
8) Teacher : "Now, children, if I saw a man beating a donkey and stopped him, what virtue would I be showing?"
Student : "Brotherly love". ![]()
9) Teacher : "Now, Sam, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating?"
Sam : "No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good cook". ![]()
10) Patient : "What are the chances of my recovering doctor?"
Doctor : "One hundred percent. Medical records show that nine out of ten people die of the disease you have. Yours is the tenth case I've treated. The others all died". ![]()
11) Teacher : " Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?"
One Student : "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day and at the same time." ![]()
12) Teacher : " George Washington not only chopped down his father's Cherry tree, but also admitted doing it.
Now do you know why his father didn't punish him ?"
One Student: " Because George still had the axe in is hand." ![]()
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